Comedy Newspaper Aricle about Smoking -- Spoof Joke Anti Smoking

A fume SpoofThe Daily SmokerFunded by the Institute for Smoking and Hacking and by the makers of FLEM Stay happy while we get rid of the nasty.The Smokers PerspectiveNicotine The Supreme Drug for Supreme HealthStaff Writer Jo The Butthead KhamelFor many years, anti- green goddess groups, such as the American Cancer Association, and government agencies, like the Food and Drug Administration, have confused and mislead the public by incorrectly concluding that smoking is bad and unhealthy. Nonsense In fact, there argon several articles that would support nicotine as a drug that promotes perfect health.For instance, and article by Doug charge of the the States Today discusses nicotines power of promoting alertness. Nicotine speeds up the communication between mindset cells and stimulates areas of the brain tied to alertness and memory. Mr. Levy also writes some nicotines relationship toward Parkinsons disease. Levy also writes that cigarette smoking can lower the risk of Parkinsons disease. Researchers claim that something in smoke lowers the levels of an enzyme known as MAO B. Smokers have about 40% less MAO B than nonsmokers or ex-smokers, according to Joanna Fowler of the Brookhaven National Lab in Upton, NY. Because reduced levels of MAO B result in great amounts of dopamine, smokers may have a lower risk of Parkinsons, a nerve disease aggravated by dopamine shortages.In another article by the Associated Press in the USA Today, researchers suggested that cigarette smoking sharpens short-term learning and memory among young people. Researchers at the University of California, San Diego, tested young smokers and nonsmokers at a volume game that required rapid memory and quick recall. The 12 electrodes attac... ...JR Renolds, Inc., and The Council for Smoking and Hacking Research.ReferencesBegley, S. Memories Are Made of.... Newsweek. November 4, 2007. 68.Associated Press. Research suggests smoking sharpens thinking. USA Today. November 19, 2007.Levy, D. N icotines power on brain tied to smokers alertness. USA Today, August 8, 2007.......Smoking, lower Parkinsons risk linked. USA Today. August 8, 2007.Disclaimer The odd names (FLEM, Flip Moris, JR Renolds, Institute for Smoking and Hacking) are not real in any form. For certain purposes, those odd names are meant to be comical and should not be affiliated with actual tobacco plant institutions and companies. However, the cited references in the essay are reported facts found in newspapers and magazine articles. Jo The Butthead Khamel is not a real person. If it is, then the use was unintentional.